An atom walks into a bar. Did it grow legs?

How many kleptomaniacs does it take to screw in a lightbulb? What lightbulb?

What did the deaf, dumb, blind kid with two stump arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

Why did the woman drop her keys? She was being raped.

Where can I apply for janitor school?

What's worse than breastfeeding a wolverine? Force-breastfeeding a wolverine.

the man walk in to the shop and brought a pet nothing

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

What do you get when you cross a black man and a Mexican man? I don't know.

What did God do to help the little girl with terminal cancer? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

Why is The stop sign bent? Because a ambulance full of sick kids hit it.

What is in your backyard and is stalking you? Corn

How did the baby die? In a very sad and tragic car accident.

How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a brick.

Knock knock Who's there Orange and Banana Orange and Banana who? ... The man opened the door and saw a bowl of oranges and bananas.

why did the chicken cross the road? he saw a rather desperate looking homeless person coming towards him, and, realizing he had no change, figured it was the best way to avoid an awkward situation.

Why did the black man jump off of a bridge? -He was in depression and comitted suicide.

What did Robert Kardashian say at O.J.'s most recent trial? Nothing. He died of esophagal cancer

someone called someone else a frog

Why w\s the English man, the French man, the German man, the Indian man, the Chinese man, the Irish man, the American man and the russian man all on a train together? They where going to the olympics.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.. Why did the 2nd monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first moneky.. Why did the 3rd monkey fall out of the tree? It thought it was a game.. Why did the 4th monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure..

osama bin laden is dead

A black guy and a white guy both interview for a job. The black guy gets the job because he is college educated and highly qualified.

A hooker walks into a bar. She orders a few drinks and leaves. She's a man.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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