what did hayley say to missy last night? I'm tired bye

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Why did the dog start barking? Because it was a dog.

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What did jimmy get for dinner? Food

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got Alzheimer's, Who are you?

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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A woman says Renae has a butt... Two men say we don't care we have her hammer. True story.

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Yo momma's so stupid she comes up in a lot of jokes titled "yo momma jokes"

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what did Marvin Gay's father say to him before he died? "hey come listen to this 45 real quick"

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No one walks into a bar The bar is slowly losing business and will soon be forclosed upon and will also lose his home as a result causing his family and himself to be homeless and slowly suffer on the streets

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did you hear about the two peanuts walking down the street? one was raped.

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Adele Gordon walks into a bar. The bartender says 'Why the long face?' Because she is a horse lol.

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What do you call a bear. Rob.

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Knock knock Who the fuck says knock knock?

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Stop. Seriously stop.

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Whats the same about a jew and firewood? They both burn.

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A bartender sees Jesus Christ, George Washington, and Adolf Hitler walk into his bar. The bartender is drunk.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he's CHICKEN.

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What is James Miller's real name? James Miller.

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Yo mama is so fat that she has to eat salad instead of sandwiches because she wants to lose weight by going on a no-carb diet.

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whats 7+4? 74

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How do you get to the store, if your car is broken down? Steal a blind girls bike, she can't ride it anyway!

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A legless and armless woman is laying on the beach. A man walks by and hears her crying. "What's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been kissed before" says the woman. So the man leans down and kisses her. The next day the man sees the woman crying at the beach again. "What's wrong this time?" asks the man. "I've never been hugged before" So the man picks up the legless and armless woman and gives her a big hug. The next day the man sees the woman still on the beach crying. "Okay now what's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been f---ked before" says the woman. So the man picks up the woman, and has sex with her. They end up going on several dates later on and getting married at sunset on the very beach where they met.

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A priest and a rabbi walks into a bar. The bartender looks at them and says "is this some kind of joke?".

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what did the boy with no arms get for easter? a cane.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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