What is the difference between a woman and a whale? One has big whiskers and is fat and filthy, the other one lives in the sea and is a mammal

What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

whats hard long and you put it in your mouth everyday a toothbrush

What do a baby and popcorn have in common? They both pop in an explosive manner when put in a microwave and both can be consumed by the person who may have put the baby and popcorn in it so if you think this is funny then you have some problems and i will shortly in some period of time when my schedule is cleared refer you to a licensed psychologist and we will make an appointment for you.

Why was the boy sad he ate a loaf of bread? Because ducks ate him alive after that.

"bus driver pressed the horn at my mum and she stuck a finger up at him " Not the first time she's got the horn and shoved a finger up

A man walks into a bar. He's just entered into the Twilight Zone.

What would Loiter Squad be if the characters were white? A show.

How do you get a cow off a swing? Hit it with an axe.

When would you find a Mexican, Asian, Black and white guy hanging out? Never

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? Because her mother inadvertently left the gate open while gardening.

What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

Q:the is a mexican and a black guy in the car who id driving? A:the cop

why did the man paint his house? cause he never wanted to mow the lawn

A man entered ten puns into a pun contest, hoping that one of them would win. Unfortunately, he came in third place and was discouraged by his loss.

Knock Knock Who's there? The Gastapo

I am paralyzed from the neck down.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He didn't he was chicken

What's the difference between a fat boy and a thin boy? Fizzy drinks!

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs water skiing? An anchor

Q.What happens when Torres scores A. He doesn't

Whats worse than being bored, Being you.

What's worse than getting a parking ticket? Getting Cancer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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