How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Totsie Roll totsie pop? Altough many tests have been done, there still isn't a certain number. There are many variables involved with this question.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Knock Knock whos there? a black man ohh ok come in

thumb_up thumb_down -31

whats the difference between an orange and a bicycle? One has handlebars..the other one doesnt.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Let them think that you are insane, vulnerable, and they wont bother leaking a lot of shit about you, this "shit info" will remain inaccurate and reveal weaknesses where there is none. I had to draw them away from you, but as soon as he began selling Intel regarding my missing eye, I figure our "not so friends in the unknown" would have eventually begun searching for "The one eyed man" among you. And had they not found one, they might just as likely made it seem as if there was one for the money. None of the thugs sent to attack me nor the "Nero decoys" where professionals, but those behind them sure are, considering that they paid these thugs more than what I make during a year. Gotta go pretty girl, hope we meet again in not so long. Moral: This is all a joke, get over it, Moral has left forever, mission complete.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What smells like diarrhea and looks like poop? A rotten banana.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What is the easiest method of making multiple women fall head over heels? Have a wingman help you raise a rope at the start of a women's running race.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

how do you get a nun pregnant? have unprotected SEX with her, resulting in expulsion from her convent

thumb_up thumb_down -31

what did the surfer do on his computer? browse the internet

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What's worse than watching paint dry or grass grow? Watching paint dry on grass.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A Jew man gets on a train. He sits down and a hour and a half later he is dropped of at his proper destination.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A black child gives away his piece of fried chicken. He is allergic, and eats some watermelon instead.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What happens when a bunch of animals break into your house... they eat you.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A man lying in bed at night rolls over and starts rubbing his wife's back. She says, "Not tonight, honey, I have a headache." Her husband respected her wishes and went to sleep.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

roses are red violets are blue i am black and so r u

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Q: Why did Captain Kirk suck his own dick? A: Nobody else was around, I guess.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What do you do if you are surrounded by 2000 Hungry cannibals? You talk to them in a calm yet determined diplomatic voice, then you become a part of them. Moral: A part of them... Forever.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What does a cookie and the twin towers have in common? They both crumble.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What's the difference between a chicken and a bartender? A chicken is a domesticated fowl, a subspecies of the red junglefowl. As one of the most common and widespread domestic animals, with a population of more than 24 billion in 2003, there are more chickens in the world than any other species of bird. Humans keep chickens primarily as a source of food, consuming both their meat and their eggs. A bartender is a person who mixes and serves alcoholic drinks at a bar. also bar-tender ; 1836, American English,

thumb_up thumb_down -31

why did the chicken cross the road............ why dont you tell me smartass

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Whats the difference between Obama and Hitler? One is the President of the United States The other is a fascist dictator that killed millions.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

why did the black man leave his home because there was a hurricane that would have killed him if he stayed.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Yogurt? You are joking right? I am having yogurt right now, do you like see trough me or something? I mean I have been told people can do that but no way!

thumb_up thumb_down -33

"Hey hey hey, did you hear the joke about the guy with terminal cancer?" "No." "Sorry to break it to you then."

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops