Who's Juan? DIS ONE

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why did the teenaged girl cry? she was about to have an abortion

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The president is invited to a party at Bill's house. Suddenly the house catches on fire. Who survived? No one, they all died.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a shiny new Cadillac? I don't have a shiny new Cadillac in my garage.

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Roses are red, Bacon is also red. Poems are hard, Bacon.

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If dogs hate cats and cats hate mice, than what do mice hate? Themselves.

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when life gives you lemons... squeeze the juice into your eyes.

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your dads so fat, he makes your mom look skinny.

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How many amish people does it take to screw in a light blub? None as the amish don't require artificial light

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How many jews can you fit into an ash-tray? none because the volume of a human is much greater than an any ash-tray

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What did the dubstep say? Wub.

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Did you hear about the young couple that confused K-Y jelly with window caulking? All their windows fell out.

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What building has the most stories? The Burj Khalifa.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Me.

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hey girl, My Gyarados is BIG enough for you to ride it ALL day and night

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A man gets shot in the balls by a huge swarm of bees HE IS VERY NICE AND FILLED WITH RICE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What would happen if you insulted Chuck Norris' mother? Considering you did it on a messageboard that only unemployed people with no social lives use, nothing.

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What's the easiest way to become filthy rich? There are many ways to earn money. Invest some time into researching the topic.

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Oh you have herpes? yeah, there's an app for that.

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What's the difference between zev hatis and a dwarf Nothing. They are both midgets and are going to die by the age of 25

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Nero, listen, do not try to imply that you created the Iron man method, that was developed by many people over the duration of many years in the former underground society. You seem far too educated to be the savage you claim to be, if I told you that our people will do the uttermost to see if we can fix that eye of yours and succeed, will you forgive my failure and imperfections as a leader? Look at it this way, I am a leader, not a ruler, what my followers do is up to them, but if they cannot understand that they have to pay the consequences behind their actions, they have no place within the order, as for the expression "my order" it is simply what my many followers like for me to say, not because they are unwilling to take responsibility, but as a token of praise. Our articulations and means of expressing desire and such are very much the same, have you ever been part of our order?

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Did you see my sandwitch? No. I am your sandwitch, and therefore no one thought to put me up to a mirror. Would you like me to? No. I have no eyes. And why are you talking to a sandwitch??? ...

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What do Michael Jackson and a T-Rex have in common? They're both dead.

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three mexicans walk into a bar... the bartender says get the fuck out!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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