what do you get if you put a baby in a microwave? an erection

What do you call a gay man? Homosexual

A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

How many hours of sleep did Jimmy get last night? Zero, because he has insomnia. Jimmy got fired from his job today because of his lack of energy and motivation due to his disorder. His wife divorced Jimmy because he can no longer support her and their two kids.

justin bieber: ask me if im a boy are you a boy? no.

What do you call it when you kill a Jewish homosexual? Murder.

A boy walks into a bar, then walked out. He's not 21!

Why did the black man have a Lamborghini in his garage? Because he got good grades in school, was accepted into a nice college, and earned a medical degree, which he used to get himself a well-paying job in the medical field.

Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

You're such a baby, that you are still in diapers! Ew! How would you know creep!

Why did the gay guy walk into a straight bar To find the better looking guys

A little boy was taken away in a black van with the promises of candy and a puppy of his very own. What he received? That fore mentioned, and more. The more? Ass rape

A my dog was a rappa. He recorded a hit. But it had no lyrics, because he is a dog.

But that just reinforces the negative stereotype that women don't have penises.

Why didnt Stevie Wonder wave back at the white man? Because he's a racist.

Why was the uneducated black guy raped? To make this joke more risky and therefore funnier.

Why are apples cheaper than lemons? Because you have to pay less money then lemons to buy them

What do you call an animal that is blue, fluffy and lives in the arctic? I don't know and that's why I'm asking you.

what do you call a bird that is gay bird a gaybird

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, and the very next day, I died because I didn't have a heart.

Why was Sally angry? Because somebody burned all her clothes

A Polish man walks into a bar and says, "Co za asy..."

Q: What kind of bees make milk? A: None. Bees make honey, not milk.

What would you do for a Klondike Bar? I would probably spend somewhere under 3 dollars at a store, but only if somebody else drives me. I really don't want to drive, not in this gas shortage. You know what...forget it, Klondike Bars make my teeth hurt due to my sensitive teeth problem. I know I should get that sensitive teeth tooth paste, but I always forget when at the store.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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