What did the homeless man get for christmas eve? Hypothermia. What did the children get for christmas day? A traumatic experience when they tripped over his snow-covered corpse.

How do you kill a blonde? Throw a fridge at her

I was sitting in traffic the other day. I was runover.

What's the cure of cancer? Death.

Two goldfish are swimming in the ocean. One says to another, "I don't think we will be able to survive in this salty environment".

What do you call it when an Arabic man gets shot? Murder.

What happened while Thomas crossed the street? He got hit by a truck. What happened to Billy? He was Thomas's Siamese twin, and he too met the same fate.

Whats blue and white and red all over? The American flag

Why did the boy fall of his bike? He's learning to ride and understandably lost his balance.

Why do sea guls fly over the sea? In order to get from place to place, flying is much faster than walking. Sea guls live on a diet of salt-water fish, and the ocean is where their main food supply subsides.

why navy seals ? they shot osoma bin laden in the face...... multiple times

my girlfriend had a weird fetish, she used to dress up like herself and act like a bitch all the time.

so a man goes to jurrasic park and sees two dinosaurs fighting. he shits himself.

Whats white and black and red all over? A panda that has just been shot by a poacher.

Why did the young boy drop his bus. He was hit by an ice cream.

Tic tac toe Your mother and I are getting a divorce.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? It got shot Why did the 2nd monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey

roses are red, violets are blue, im not going out with someone that belongs in a zoo.

Why are rich guys gay? Because they hang around other rich guys

whats worse than a kane nothing

Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Kncok Whose there? Not Sally

What did the man do when he got home from work? Hit his wife.

Caitlin Jenner has a mangina.

Why did the little girl drop her ball? Because she was done playing with it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...