What did the trucker say when his hat blew out the window? "**** my hat!" What did the teenager say when the same thing happened to him in his small car? The same thing, except he was a teenager, driving a small car.

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how many dead babies can you fit into a blender? 17 how do you get them out? Tortilla chips, but you'd be arrested by that time anyway because you just murdered 17 babies

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Why was the little boy crying? Well first off he is adopted. He then woke up and found out his pop star dad is dead. ..... His name is blinket.

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Three gay men walk into a bar and there is only one three-legged stool. What do they do? --One man politely tells one of the other men to have a seat and then the two remaining men leave and have a one-night stand.

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What did the tractor say to the farmer? Nothing, tractors don't talk

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There was a little boy in kindergarten who really had to go to the bathroom. So he asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom, and she told him he could go at snack time. The little boy really had to go to the bathroom, so he asked his teacher again, and like before, she told him to wait until it was snack time. The little boy had to go very very badly and asked the teacher one more time. This time the teacher said "if you can say the alphabet, then you can go to be bathroom" so the little boy got up all his courage and started off with "A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y and Z." Then the teacher said,"good job" and let him go to the bathroom. When he went there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "What will it be tonight?" He then promptly remembers he is on anti-joke.co but is too late to react. The horse has already shit on the floor. This is the fifth time this week that this has happened.

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There once was a man from Kentuckit, who like to dissapear with his dog and clean up the shit using a plastic bag and put it in the allocated public bin.

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Why did the baby fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Why did the Mexicans climb the fence? When they were tossing frisbee and accidentally tossed it into their neighbors yard and they had to go get it.

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What's worse than losing the remote? Dying of cancer.

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if dragonflies have purple toe nails, then how many pancakes does it take to build a doghouse? canada, because snakes don't have armpits!

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were at work systems r down

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Q: What do you call an alligator in a vest? A: An investigator

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What is worse than breaking your pencil? Flying on a magic carpet

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The horse said nothing because it doesn't understand human language.

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Why did the black man kill himself? Because he had a very serious case of depression brought on by his recent divorce

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Why couldn't Little Johnny read his 3rd grade novel? His was repeatedly stabbed in his eyes.

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Whats worse than suicide? death

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Why did the chicken cross the road? What does chicken mean?

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, He gave me AIDS, And I gave them to you!

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Why was the Black person afraid of the chainsaw? Be cause it goes run nigga nigga run nigga nigga run

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Asians

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Whats worse than seeing your family killed in front of your eyes? Not much to be honest

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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