How did the guy fall off the roof? He was pushed

A blonde was drinking water from the water fountain. She was very thirsty.

What do you call a black man in space An astronaut

Why did the man answer his cell phone at 3 AM in the morning? Because his phone was ringing and was probably waiting for an important phone call

How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two, but the real question is why there are two flies having sex inside a light bulb.

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue U suck Dick Just Like Ur Dad did to u

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Walt dies in breaking bad.

Why did billy fall down the stairs? He got pushed.

Hickory Dickory Dock. 2 mice ran up the clock. The clock struck one.. and the second one got away with major injuries, dying in a hospital three days later. The clock is now serving its 8th year in jail out of 25 years, and does not regret anything.

What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Roast Beef is a solid and Pea Soup is a liquid

What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for his birthday? A basketball.

Did you hear about the dyslexic that choked on his own vimto?

A Muslim, a Jew and a Christian are on an airplane talking about religion. The Jew tells the Christian he believes in a single holy entity. The Christian says he believe Christ is the Son of that very same entity. The Muslim says "When can I get out of this room?" because he's been detained at the airport due to religious profiling.

Why did the fat kid break his leg? He got hit by a car

What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? He didn't, animal control took the dog away from Helen because she could not properly care for the dog.

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being raped by your uncle

Why did little nancy call the police? Because her dad beats her toaster up.

What is the biggest lie in the world How the **** should I know

why does horse head huffer keep posting here? because he really doesn't understand the concept.

whats worse than taking a refrigerator to the face? the holocaust and AIDs

How does your sister ride a bicycle? My sister does not have any legs.

Q) What is the difference between an elephant and a toaster? A) Do you seriously not know the difference between an elephant... and a toaster?

Why did the man have a hard time trying to open the door? The door was locked

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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