Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I'm a dog.

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Guess where my mom lives? Utah? Correct Guess where my dad lives? Utah? Correct Guess where my aunt lives Utah!?!?!? NO!!!! Trick Question b... she's dead

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A grasshopper hops into a bar. The bartender looks down at him and says "Hey, we have a drink named after you." the grasshopper looks up at the bartender...then proceeds to hop along because Grasshoppers can't communicate with humans. Then several of the bars patrons looked at the bartender, worried for his mental health.

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Why did the road cross the chicken? The 2 nouns in the sentence has been switched.

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Q. How many Jews can you fit in a car? A. Four, I drive a Volkswagen Jetta

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Bartender: What are you having? Sally: Can I have a martini? Bartender: How do you want it? Sally: I want it tall and black, like my man.

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You know what makes jokes funny? Irony You know what makes anti-jokes funny? Common sense

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So there is two clowns. Pickle and Jim. If you were asked who was funnier, you would probably say pickle. Well you would be wrong. It's Jim.

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James Patrick Campbell

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ur mum

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A man walks inta pet store looking for a dog. All he finds are cats.What did he end up buying. A weasel

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Did you hear the one about the chicken crossing the road? It wanted to go to the other side.

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Who always participates in "No shave November"? The homeless.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? I don't know, he couldn't open the presents.

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Why did the Asian guy's condom slip? Because the condom was put on the opposite way.

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Yanter, Look it up

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What is my favorite color? How the heck should I know?

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What did the pillow say to the dragon? Nothing, because pillows don't talk, dragons aren't real and this is a highly improbable circumstance.

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Why was Johnny so sad His father beat his mother

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why dont black people go on cruises? there not falling for that one again

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What did the white man say to the black man? Hi i'm Steve, it's nice to meet you

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what did the asian father say to his son after getting a c+ on a test? son you are working hard and i know you will do well

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Penis. (Note: if you get this you have a dirty ass)

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How do you cheer up a sad caterpillar? KILL IT WITH FIRE

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops