how do you make my dad say oww? throw a baseball bat at him.

"Solids tunderf" he said, while chewing his gum.

Q: Why can't Micheal J Fox draw a perfect circle? A: Because drawing a perfect circle is impossible for any human. Actually a perfect circle doesn't exist.

What did the baby say to it's mother as it was being thrown in the trash bin? Nothing, it couldn't talk yet.

How do you make pie without the oven? I dont kow, go google it.

Is your refrigerator running? no then your food is probably beginning to rot

OIO

A white man, a black man, and a mexican are stranded on an island. They all died.

whats worse than the holacost? your mom giving you cubes in your drink when you requested crushed instead

Why did the man get ran over by th STREET? Because he crossed the TURTLE!

New Name for Jersey Shore: American Whorer Story

Last week, I visited the Virgin Islands. Now it's just called Islands.

I like colin but not as much as apple

I'm winning at Scrabble.

how does stephen hawking get an erection? he turns off his pop-up blocker

guys stop with the jewish jokes anne frainkly its getting old

Female rights.

What is the difference between a seal and an armadillo? They are both aquatic animals, except for the armadillo.

What do you call a man named Cornelius? Well, he prefers to go by his middle name, Eric, because he was teased as a child for being named Cornelius.

why did the mokey fall out of the tree because it was dead.

Q: What's black and white and rape kids? A: Pandas, I lied about the rape.

What do you call a black man? Black

-Knock, Knock -Who's there? -Carl -Carl wh-wait... carl...CARL OH MY GOD!!!! WE ALL THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD ,CARL!!!! Where have you been? Oh my god... Mom's DEAD! When we all thought you were dead she hung herself! IT'S YOUR FAULT SHE'S DEAD, CARL! YOUR FAULT!!!!!! YOU ARE AN UNGRATEFUL PIECE OF SHIT CARL! YOU KNOW THAT? I hope you burn in hell.

So this guy walks into a bar and– Nevermind it's really not that funny.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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