What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing, his mouth was full of it's intestines.

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you're mommas so fat that her doctor says she is morbitly obese and may die of a heart failure later in life

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why was ej's penis hard? because he had just got done having fine exquisit sex which he had ejaculated with a sturn body builder name frank who he had been seeing for the past few months.

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a horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" Then the horse left because that question is racist to horses.

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How do I get to Carnegie Hall? The address is 881 Seventh Avenue at 57th street in New York. it's beside the Russian Tea Room and almost directly across from the IESE school of business. The Russian Tea Room has a large bright red awning out front and a large carving of three dancing bears on the face of the building, the bears are covered in gold leaf. You can't miss it.

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A man walked into doctors and said, “Doctor help! My arms have stopped working” to which the receptionist replied, “I’m not the doctor and you need to make an appointment.”

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two pigs in a bath one says to the other can you pass me the soap..the other replies..do I look like a typewriter!?

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Knock knock Who's there? Taco Taco who? Taco bell

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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Q:what has four legs, is green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? A:a pool table

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So 3 Jews walk into a bar, I lied, it was a gas chamber.

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Why did the Billy flunk the test? His parents were killed in a refridgerator

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Chuck Norris can right-click with a mac mouse

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Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The chicken

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Yo momma's so fat she got her own zip code! except she doesn't because zip codes are reserved for much larger areas than that of your mother.

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im in stttttttttiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiittttttttttttttttttccccccccccccchhhhhhhhhhhhhheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesssssssssssss

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What do you get when you cross batman and superman? One egotesticul idiot SOB aka mofo ????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

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penispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenis

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A tree fell in the forest. The person in the house it hit heard it.

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Dick in your vagina fuck cock cunt shit

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Q: what's blue and kills you when it falls from the sky? A: a whale no shit

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Two swallows migrate to Africa. One swallows initiates the conversation, that's when the other catch fire.

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Q: what do you call a black priest A: Coley s**t

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You have stage IV Ovarian Cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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