Why did the man cry when he went to the doctor? He has a terminal illness progressed to the point of cure and would die in 3 hours.

Knock knock Get off my porch.

How did the fat guy die? After an autopsy, it was discovered he was unaware of his type 2 diabetes and therefore did not treat it

Statistically speaking, one out if every seven dwarves are unhappy

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poetry, Show me your tits.

I saw a woman get donkey punched in the middle of the street. Nero the clit collector: You know... What is it called when A donkey kinda lifts its front hoove and hits a woman? ...WHAT? DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE STARVE TO DEATH BECAUSE OF YOUR COIN COLLECTION? YOUR STAMPS ARE MURDER! (or something) At least my uh... "Friends" survive... SOMETIIIIIIIIMEEEEEEEEES!!!!!!! ...And then I kill them.

What do Ethiopians do for dinner? Starve.

Why do black people eat at KFC? Because KFC serves good food at reasonable prices.

How many people does it take to kill the president? A number

How do you give Salley enough energy swim against the river current? Add your own electric current.

What did the black kid get for his birthday? Yo bike!

I nicknamed my diick "the truth" because the biitches can't handle it

Why did the kid drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus

When is a Jew the sleepiest? Depends on the time really... some people sleep and wake up on different biological calendars.

I had a really funny joke about a dead baby...but I threw it out

Hi, how are you doing? Good how about yourself? Fine, thanks. Nice weather we're having Yeah, not too bad Have a nice day You too

Q: How does a chicken get to work? A: A chicken does not go to work. Chickens can not legally be employed for any position in any country as they are chickens, are not human, and do not posses any prerequisites required to be hired for any existing employable position.

What do you call a dirty black person? Unhygienic

Why did the mailman cross the road? To deliver mail

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot

Why didn't the chicken cross the road Because the light said don't walk

why did the dog chase it's tail? it has a case of OCD where he was obsessed with catching his tail and would spin until he passed out or threw up.

One time I masturbated by myself

A boy wakes up in the morning and says i"'m feeling kind of fishy today," the boy's dad walks in and relpies "that's because you are a fish."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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