I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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What do you call a sandwich that has sandwich on it? A sandwich.

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Top Gear USA

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What did the little orphan girl get for christmas? nothing her parents are dead

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Once upon the time.... It was 12 o´clock

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so theres this big moose, and it walks into a convenience store and asks the lady bitch "where are the potatoes?" and she says "ehh, down aisle 5" so he goes down isle five, and there aint no potatoes

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What happens when you park a new Cadillac with a roll of $100 dollar bills on the dashboard in a black neighborhod? Many residents of that peaceful community will briefly glance at it and admire the wealth of the automobile's owner.

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Why is this funny? cause it is funny

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When I eat Mi Familia Mexica food, it burns when I go to the bathroom. Is that bad?

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If there are 50 oranges and 50 waffles tied to a fence post. How many cow utters does it take to shit green? urine.

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This one sucks!

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Why didn't the girl get on the school bus? It was Sunday.

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what do you call a black man flying a plane?? a pilot ,you racist!

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What's the difference between Amy Winehouse and Michael Jackson? Spelling.

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Why did the little boy cry regularly? Because his father was sexually abusive.

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what hurts more than a stab wound? two stab wounds

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Why was the boy in hospital? He fell off the bus and was run over by many cars.

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It's that time of the month again... ...to cut my toenails.

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how do you fit 100 babies in a bowl? with a blender. how do you get them back out of the bowl? with tortila chips.

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Why did he have to die so young? It just isn't fair... In all considerations, the bullet didn't ask to become embedded in his skull either.

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How do you wake up a black man? Punch him in the face.

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whats fluffy and pink? -pink fluff whats blue and fluffy? -pink fluff holding its breath.

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knock knock. Who's there? The delivery man.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange Who? Oranges are very good for you and enriched with vitamin C that is apparently good to intake when you are experiencing cold/flu like symptoms during the winter season and your doctor won't give you medication because you aren't sick enough and you already ask for medication to much because you think you are always sick with something. That's what happens when you're a hypochondriac.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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