A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license. She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys could get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you."

Q:John has 50 candy bars and he eats 45, what does john have? A: Diabetes

What did the farmer say when he lost his truck? Wheres my truck?

A man stepped on a nail. He died shortly after of lockjaw.

Did y'all see Lafell catch that pass? Neither did I

What is worse than reading an anti-joke relatively similar to the other? Walking in your front yard and realizing a zombie is eating your dead grandmother.

How can you spot a blind person at a nudist colony? They might be carrying a white stick, or have a guide dog or someone to help them navigate the premises.

what did the fat guy say to the girl ill make fun of you because i have bigger tits than you

Your Mom is so poor she can't afford home-owners insurance.

What happened to the man who sat outside in the sun too long? He died of skin cancer.

How do you get a firetruck to swerve uncontrollably? Shoot the driver with a 12 gauge.

How do stop a clown from laughing? Hit in the face with a hatchet.

Why was the Mexican sleeping? He wishes to decrease his risk of motor vehicle accidents.

Q: whats a bunny's favorite music genre A: smooth jazz

A blonde and a brunette are stuck on a desert island, they later died of starvation.

What do a Mexican, and American, a black guy, and an Asian all have in common? Believe it or not, they all like cantalope.

George Bush.

Three moose were in the middle of the road. They were then shot by a maniac hunter.

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

Yo mamas so fat.

Why does life suck? Because it does

Have you ever heard about the black man who got shot my a goat? Neither did I.

- What's the difference between a squirrel? - It can neither fly.

WNBA

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...