Why was 2 afraid of 3? Because 345!!!!!

What did Chuck Norris say when he saw a cop -Hi

I went to the zoo the other day there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu. By Nathan Luque CARROTS!!!

What's worse than stepping on a snail? Stepping on a bear trap.

Why did the chicken cross the playground? Thats what she said

What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? It's the police, they ask the questions.

What did one homo say to the other? Well, the politically correct term is homosexual, and he didn't say anything because they've never met.

if bob has 400 pieces of chocolate and eats 200 chocolates how many does he have left. none he died from diabetes

Q: What's worse than finding 1 worm in your apple? A: Finding 2 worms in your apple Q: What's worse than finding 2 worms in your apple? A: The Holocaust Q: What's worse than the Holocaust? A: Finding 3 worms in your apple!

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Two cows are in a field. One says to the other, "are you worried about this mad cow disease that's going around?" The other replies, "I'm not worried - I'm a squirrel."

Once upon a time there was a nice old man who loved to ride his bike... He unfortunately died when he had a heart attack.

A plane is going to land at 3:30, if the monkey is holding a gun how does the bus driver commite suicide 12, because the laywer attacked the dyslexic man.

What's white and hides in a tree. A refrigerator.

there is a mexican and a black guy in the back of a car, who is driving? The cop

Why did the girl drop out of school? She was being sexually assaulted by her mothers alcoholic boyfriend and was having trouble coping.

What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming? Here come the elephants.

Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

What is blue and angry? Mr Johnston wearing his green dress. I'm colour blind but he came round to my way of thinking in the end.

Cut off your fingers and lose weight fast!!!

And the Lord said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.

Rishi is a funny guy, well he thinks he is. true story.

Whats worse than finding a spider in your shower? Getting repeatedly stabbed in the dick by a rapid chipmunk.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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