What is worse than a worm in your apple? An apple in your worm!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the man say after falling off the bridge? He didn't say anything. He died a terrible and painful death on impact.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the man go to jail? He abused and later murdered his spouse.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the victim say to the rapist? If you're gonna rape me, at least let me go get you a condom

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the big chimney say to the smaller chimney? Nothing chimneys don't talk

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock. Knock Who's there? Jim. Jim who? Jim your best friend.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What is Debbie short for? She has no legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why is a banana yellow? I don't know, ask a scientist, stupid

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Are you from Tennessee? Because you accent is really not hiding it

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Paragnormal Activity: The confused sequels. My wife literally had an heart attack 5/5! -Awesome reviews. I am going to need therapy for the rest of my life! 5 out of 5 stars! -Star reviews THIS MOVIE KILLED MY DOG! 4.5/5 -Petlovers I literally died! 10/10 -Rotten Potatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do birds need when they are sick? Most wild animals die when they are sick. However, they can sometimes be nursed back to health with special food and electrolyte solutions in special animal rehabilitation centres.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Moral Man Solid V: The Pain Phantom.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why was Sally crying because a flock Of seagulls just took a shit in her head

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the judge say to the midget when he sent him to jail ? Stop beating your wife

thumb_up thumb_down +13

I would rape her

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Whats worse than a rotten tomato. a fridge hitting your baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why did joe drown ? he had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's big and red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did Lady Gaga arrive at the Grammy's in an egg? Because she was born that way.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the dog kill the fish? He had no reason, he just wanted fish. What, you thought he had like, a vendetta? pssh your crazy

thumb_up thumb_down +13

So there are 5 people on a plane the president, a movie star, and man who is on the verge of making world peace, the smartest man in the world, and the pope the piolt has a heart atack at and the plane will crash soon there are only 4 parachutes. So the first is Obama and he saysI won a Nobel piece prize and I run American see ya later and he takes the parachute next Steven hawking says sory pope Im taking this because I don't believe in God and black holes are cool so he takes the parachute and jumps out. Next Charlie Sheen says I need to entertain people and keep the drug dealers in business so he. Takes the parachute and jumps out. Then Francis turns to the hippie and says if you achive world peace it may help eliminate some poverty so you take the last paratute and jump out then the hippie says in return no its OK Steven Hawking took my back back. When they land they decide to serch for Steven's body and they find nothing. You see Steven Hawking had taken his own paratute with him and took the Hippies backpack to sell it and make some money

thumb_up thumb_down +13

so your skydiving in the ocean and one of you bedroom windows break. how many bloodstains does it take to paint a peice of bread covered in goat milk? the answer is D. 2731 books on cannabalism

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Roes are red Violets are blue I felt silly for writing this Because violets are violet.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops