Why did the little boy have a gun pointed at his head? Because he hated his life and wanted to kill himself.

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A Duck walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "I'd like to buy some peanuts." The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't sell peanuts." The duck turns around and leaves.

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Why is 6 scared of 7? Because 7 is right behind 7 and he's naked.

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Halts Maul Reid. Das ist, was ich rede.

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"The hills are alive..." Impossible, hills can never be alive.

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Libyans stage a protest. They get massacred.

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when i go to a nude beach people think im looking for lost jewelery and treasure

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A young blonde walks into a bar and orders a shot of tequila. After about a few minutes she spots this very ugly man with one leg. The man just so happens to sit right next to her and orders a drink. The man reeks of cockroaches and he looks like a homeless man that hasn't bathed in months. They never talk and the blonde goes home.

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What did the man say after falling off the bridge? He didn't say anything. He died a terrible and painful death on impact.

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Your Mom is so fat... I'm sorry I didn't mean that.. I have abandonment issues.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because her dad through a fridge at her

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Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

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Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

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Why was the manspenis big Cause he was a lucky bastard

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They say that laughter is the key to a long life. What's the key to a short life? Death.

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What's the difference between a BMW and a murder victim? I don't have a BMW in my garage.

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A serial killer kills a family of 5 He is never found and eventually kills himself from depression

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What happened to those who survived the attack on Hiroshima? They were killed in Nagasaki

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house... Knock knock Who's there? The Chincken

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Why did the kitchen cross the road?

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Just kidding! Stephen Hawking doesn't drink.

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What's the difference between a duck? Nothing, they're both the same.

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how may i help you

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KASEEM IS CRAP AT GEARS OF WAR THIS IS NOT A JOKE ITS TRUE (FACT) PLAYSTATION IS BETTER THEN XBOX (BIGGEST JOKE EVER) IV HAD BOTH, SO SHUT UP PS3 BOYS AKA GIRLS

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops