What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind.

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Q: How does a robber get into your house? A: Through a door.

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Jingle bells Batman smells WHERE IS SHE??!!?!?!?

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Why do women wear deodorant and makeup? Because they're ugly and they stink.

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What do you call a black astronaut? It depends on what his name is.

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What did the cashier say to the customer? You're total is $27.95

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what do you get when you cross an African with a Rhinoceros? A rhinoceros.

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What's the best joke in the world? This one.

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the doctor says to the patient " i have some good news and some bad news" the patient says well what is it dock " well the good news is your fine " the patient asked what the bad news was and the doctor said " i lied about you being fine you have aids, and testicular cancer and you have 2 days to live"

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A zebra dies and goes to animal heaven. All the animals around him are trotting, flying, jumping, each according to its own species, in the kind of bliss that only eternity can bring. But the zebra is not impressed and mopes through heaven's green fields. A giraffe notices his languid stupor and asks, "Why so glum, pal?" The zebra mournfully replies, "All my life I've wondered if I was black with white stripes or white with black stripes." The giraffe, hoping to get the zebra to some answers as quickly as possible, suggests, "Why not go as God?" The zebra, somewhat taken aback by the notion that God might give him an audience, replies, "Oh, I can do that?" The giraffe says, "Sure, I'll show you the way!" The giraffe leads the zebra to a great tabernacle of gold and points the way up a long stairway of diamond. The zebra follows the stairs up to two great ivory doors. But no matter what he tried, the zebra couldn't get the door open. The only animals that could open the door for him would be the primates because of their opposable digits, but the zebra wasn't much of a social animal, so he didn't have any friends. He spent eternity with no answer to his question.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Two Girls One Cup

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How do you make a Hispanic man sad? Answer: steal everything he has until he has nothing

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What do Michael Jackson and your family have in common? They're both dead.

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this kid named terry was sitting in computer class then he got punched in the face

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Roses are red Violets are blue My dick can talk And it says it wants you

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What Do You Call Black People Skydiving? A fun time.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have narcolepsy.

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Why did the man shoot himself Because he was black

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What's a Jew's favorite food? You would have to ask on an individual basis because it is unfair to say that all Jew's have the same favorite food

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Man frantically runs into a bar, he suffers brain damage and cannot remember anything about his life. Though he tries to make everything go back to the way it once was, he and his wife grow distant and their family falls apart.

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What do you call a dolphin on a unicycle? You need medical help

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Q. How many lemons does one person take to fill a ladder? A. Fish

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why did the kid let go of his kite? He got struck by lightning

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Why can't Ray Charles read? Because he's dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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