What do you call girls that can run faster than me? Virgins

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why did the chicken cross the road? It was running from the black man

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Why was the Mexican in pain? Someone hit him with a frying pan 5 times across the face.

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roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweat and so are you

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Why do people make antijokes? Because they can

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What did the doctor say to the little boy? Pull down your pants and cough.

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What did the white man say to the group of mexicans when a golf ball was coming toward them? 4!

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Who was the first person Steven Hawking runs up to when he finds out something new about science? He is in a wheelchair due to a condition called ASL, therefore he cannot "run"

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Salesmen. Does this smell like chloroform to you?

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When life gives you lemons, You find a new life

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If an anti joke is told, and it is about an aunty is it an aunty anti joke? Adolf Hitler.

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Why did the cat explode on the street? Cause i put a grenade in a fridge and then threw it at it.

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Cows make a world go round and round They also live in the town town town They make a funny sound sound sound MOO MOO MOO MOO MOO Where do cows go on saturdays? The MOOvies I am Cow Hear me MOO I weigh 10 times more than you! Why are cows black and white? Cause they dont want to be racist

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody knows, he was hit by a car.

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Why did little Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. A. Knock, Knock! B. Who's There? Not Suzie.

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Jesus said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But, John came fifth and won a toaster.

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What's black and very long? The line-up at KFC.

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Q: How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? A: They beat her.

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I AM DEAD, FUCKING, SERIOUS! NOW GET OVER HERE MOMMY I WANT TO... ...Thats pretty disgusting, I was born a man, maybe an infant man, but a man regardless. So how about you stop showcasing me to people here and we just take off? I mean I am dead tired and sleepy, I would say good night, but its day here now so yeah.

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Loner.

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Why didn't peyton manning's grand mom call him after his game? She died of throat cancer 5 years ago

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What do you call a bear eating another bear? A cannibal.

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What do Jews, Muslims and Blacks have in common? They are all valuable members of the community and should be treated no differently from anyone else

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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