What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, Obama is a good president, I beg to differ.

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chuck norris's daughter lost her virginity but he got it back

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Janey Had her first kiss with Jonny. Jonny choked on her ridiculously large was of gum and died.

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How do you you know when you haven't slept in a while? You're tired.

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What came first the chicken or the egg? The chicken god made two of every animal

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text this number 2066191208 saying i wanna rape you

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

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If you give a homeless man a fish he eats for the night, if you teach him to fish then he probably won't be able to feed himself anyway, he is too poor to afford a pole.

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I'm a raging homosexual.

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Why did you visit antijoke.com? Because you don't find real jokes funny.

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Nohypocondrism: When you feel fine and everyone keeps telling you you are a sick bastard. Charisma: Hey, that guy that changed my life killed the neighbor, cool rite? I mean that damn neighbor did say nothing to me when I said hi. Solitude: When the room is so overcrowded that you feel small and alone. I think that people that are jack of all trades and master of none are stupid... I AM JACK OF NO TRADES AND MASTER OF ALL! I am nothing, because nothing lives on forever, nothing is unbreakable, nothing is really awesome on a terrible day... I am also Nobody, because Nobody has more money than me.. FUUUUUUUU..

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Why was Michael Jackson seen shopping at Kmart? Because he heard little boys pants were 50% off the original price.

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Think of your favorite joke. Thats so weird! Thats exactly the same as this joke!

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What happened when the chicken crossed the road? The Farmer immediately noticed the oncoming car and flagged it down so the driver would stop and he could grab his chicken and carry it safely back to the coop

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what did the mexicans name their daughter? nothing. they were deported before they had a chance

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Why did the black man have to stand in the bus? All of the other seats were taken.

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Why does Michael j. Fox make the best milkshakes? He uses the finest ingredients

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What's worse than not receiving presents on Christmas Day? Being forced to consume your own flesh

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Why did the squirl eat the accorn? Because he enjoys it.

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Q:What happened when Smokey the Bear was the one who started the forest fire? A: He got arrested just like you would have

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What gets wetter as it dries? Sarah Jessica Parker

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How do you confuse a blond? Begin talking to her about a subject that's not in her field of expertise using complicated technical verbiage and jargon.

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How many black men does it take to change a light bulb? Just one, you racist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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