What did the 3 bears say when they saw goldielocks sleeping in their bed? Nothing. Bears can't talk so they ate her.

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If Jimmy has 50 pieces of candy and eats 40 of them, what does he have now? Jimmy has diabetes.

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I AM SO FAT I WANT TO EAT MORE FOOD. I NEED A DOCTOR BECAUSE IM GOING TO END UP LIKE YOUR MOM!

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You cant like my stuff ive known you for like 1 day. just kidding you can like whatever you want, actually ive know you for 5 years

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Why did the man rob a bank? Because he was poor.

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why couldnt the boy get into the pirate movie? he was hit by a mexican telephone server.

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What do you call a man with a shovel through his head? Unless he was carrying ID when he died; John Doe.

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why was the guy stranded on an island? because his boat crashed.

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When life gives you lemons... wait that wont happen

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Why did the little boy cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken

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Why didnt the black man run the marathon? He was in jail

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

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Whats Black and White all Over? Ask Your Mother

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Q: What did the Mexican kid get for Christmas? A: My bike.

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Whats funny about the Holocaust? Absolutely nothing considering millions of people perished and you people think its funny!

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What do you call a black man who walks into a jail cell? A hard working and dedicated police officer who was just putting his first offender in jail.

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What can you sit on, drink from and sleep on? A chair, a cup and a bed.

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Why is Michael J. Fox so good at shake-a-weight? He is in shape.

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What's blue and pillowy? A blue pillow

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woman's rights

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Nobody knows why she swallowed the fly, she probably won't die.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? "Robin get in the car"

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How many black guys does it take to change a lighbulb idk, you cant see its dark

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops