What happened to your face? I walked into a tree

What is green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels part.

A priest, a monk, and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order drinks and keep the conversation to non-controversial topics.

what did batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile "robin, get in the batmobile"

A man spots Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles. He proceeds to tell his friends the story, who in turn believe him, as the story is plausible.

What did one Black man say to the other Black man before they ate? I hope you're hungry!

A disabled man walks into a bar.

Dylan is a person

A man walks in to a bar and says "ouch."

Stephen Walking.

How do you stop a second date from happenin? You force a dead mouse in your date's vagina.

I need a good anti joke....

'l give you a nickle to tickle my pickle i'l give you a dime to take you time

Barack Obama

Why are the British so uptight? I don't think they are.

You're smart... And I can tell a joke.

Why did the man starve to death? Because his wife died

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Muffins can't speak therefor it said nothing.

why did the chicken cross the road? It is impossible to tell because we cannot communicate with chickens, but we can assume there was something of interest over there.

Why do gay guys like push pops? Because they are a delicious lollipop treat.

what did the fat guy say to the girl ill make fun of you because i have bigger tits than you

How many Amish people does it take to change a light bulb? None because they don't believe in technology.

What is Jetlag? When your computer is running too many applications in the background while you're trying to play a game of Jetman so it starts lagging.

One day, a mother was speaking with her daughters. "Mommy," the first one said, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we brought you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second daughter said, "Why did you name me Rose?" ""Because when we brought you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMBWWAAAAGGGH!" the last daughter cried. She was born with severe special needs and is incapable of coherent speech.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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