Roses are red, Violets are blue when I saw you what the heel are you

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How do you keep an idiot busy? Why would you wanna keep an idiot busy, it's not gonna make a difference...

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why do sea guls fly over the sea? In order to get from place to place, flying is much faster than walking. Sea guls live on a diet of salt-water fish, and the ocean is where their main food supply subsides.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A muslim walks into a bomb store. He is a police officer and quickly arrests the owners of the store because of the obvious legal violations.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What do you call a black man on a bicycle? A thief. What do u call a black man in school? Janitor. What do you call a black man in court? Guilty

thumb_up thumb_down +18

4

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's green and has wheels? Grass, I was joking about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Who is worse than Justin Bieber? Hitler

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the plane crash and everybody die on board? The plane crashed because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the prostitute survive the gunshot? She was wearing a bulletproff vest.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A viking walks into a bar, and orders 6 beers. the man working asks "why did you order so many beers?" the viking says"because one for me 6 brothers who were separated from me many years ago." then he leaves. the next morning the viking walks into the bar, and orders 5 beers.the man working says"im sorry for your loss." the viking says"what? oo no im just getting tierd of drinking!'

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Penal Dysfunction

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did one tube of glue say to the other tube of glue? Nothing. Inanimate objects, such as a tube of glue, however adhesive the contents of said objects are, are in no way capable of advanced speech, let alone basic communication.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Woman.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Aodhan peanut head Hearty

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's so good about being Swiss? Well.... The flag's a big plus

thumb_up thumb_down +16

a man walked into a store got what he wanted and left.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you call a person at your door? Whatever his name happens to be.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the car stop. someone threw a cow at it.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did the bear say to the mouse? Roar.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Q:why did the woman make a sandwitch. A: cause she is a woman

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did the soldier say when he got shot in the face? Nothing, he died.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did Anne Frank do this weekend? Nothing. she died in the holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What is not a crocodile? The teenage mutant ninja turtles

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops