What's the difference between a Lamborghini and 10 dead babies? I don't keep a Lamborghini I'm my garage

Teacher: Billy what do you want to be when you grow up? Billy: A fireman! Teacher: Tommy what do you want to be when you grow up? Tommy: 9/11

Yo momma's so dumb, she's not smart.

How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

Why did the mentally handicapped kid fail his math test? Because he didn't study.

A man walks into a bar with an ape. The ape defecates on the floor. The bartender ordered them both out.

What do an elephant and grapes have in common? They both have a trunk...except for the grapes

Woman rights.

why did the baby cross the road? because it was stapled to the chicken -written by sion dafydd jones, uk

What did the man say when he lost all his hair? Man: My life has been getting worse and worse ever since I developed cancer.

What did the african american ninja say to the jewish bartender? Can I have a beer?

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

Why did Sara fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock.. Whose there? Not Sara

The eighties called They were pretty exited about inventing a telephone that can call the future

What is the most important thing to have during a zombie apocalypse? Oxygen.

Who's a looser and has no friends??? Max!!! His address is 2131 HighHills Narrow...

Friends are like bananas. If you peel their skin and eat them they die.

What is large, white, and can't climb trees? A refrigerator.

What do you do when you fall of the horse? Consider calling the paramedics because it's possible that when you hit the ground your brain sustained damage and you should be rushed to a hospital immediately.

What did the scientist call a spider? An arachnid.

Roses are Red Violets are plucked So are my nose-hairs Pretty disgusting

A seal walks into a club.

Why did the woman make a sandwich? Because she was hungry.

Q. Why was the blonde fired from the M+M factory? A.She was addicted to meth.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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