What do you call a man who eats a swordfish at 11 o'clock? Dead by midnight.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Speak to her in a nonsensical language of gibberish you have devised without her being able to understand or translate.

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vbh

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Women's rights.

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How do you know if there's an elephant in your fridge? The fridge is broken and the elephant has mauled your dog

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What's the cookie monster's favorite kind of cookie? Oreos

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Q: Do you know what Lady Gaga make for his birthday? A: A party

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How do you stop an alcoholic from drinking ? You leave him in the desert for 4 days, eventually he'll die from dehydration .

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What did the black guy do to the hooker, he took her dead body out of his trunk

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A white guy, a black guy, an Indian guy, and a Jewish guy walk into a bar. They drink in moderation and discuss their children, the current state of the economy, and global politics before retiring home to their families.

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yo mama so fat, she weighs 478 pounds and is in high risk of cardiovascular dieses and/or heart failure.

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How many one does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Knock Knock I said, who's there? KNOCK KNOCK OH MY GOD, WHO IS IT??? Yes, we have your daughter here, she was caught doing drugs on school property.

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One day 2 people were gonna fight after school and the final bell wrung then they started the mtch and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing that you say when you don't want to fight and ypu let the other person win?" The other guy says, "I give up?" Then the challenger says, " I WIN!!!"

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how can you tell if your moms fat? if Dora can't explore her (mx)

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What did Chuck Norris say when he saw a cop -Hi

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Why do gay people go to the beach on memorial? idk im not gay

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why is john so fat years of over eating

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What did the priest say to Jesus when he revealed himself on Christmas morning? Happy birthday

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whats the difference between a snail? - both legs are the same lenght, especially the left one.

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Why did 6 hook up with 7 ?

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was Suzy Knock Knock Who's There The Holocaust

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A bear and a rabbit sits by a small lake in the forest, taking a shit. After a while, the bear asks the rabbit: "Do you have problems with shit hanging from you fur after you're done?" The Rabbitm ponders, and responds: "No, bear. I really don't". Than the bear wiped his ass with some moss.

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what did the lawyer say to the doctor? hello.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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