What's the difference between a BMW and pile of dead babies? I don't have a BMW in my garage.

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I have two hands. Some people dont.

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The doctor asks the patient how he's doing, the patient says fine. The doctor says "that's weird cause you have leukemia."

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There was an Irishman, an American and a French man standing at a bar. They all ordered drinks and struck up conversation with each other about what they do for a living and their families. They all go home to their partners and have a peaceful nights sleep.

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Wanna hear a great joke? (any answer) Your dad's choice of condom.

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Why did the father not text back? He died in a car crash

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What would you do for a Klondike bar? I'd probably pay in cash.

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Whats worse than finding a jew in you bed. Jake skellern

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69

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What do you get if you cross a lin and a deer? A pile of bloody bones.

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Blue fish occasionally consume large amopunts of the insides of oak trees.

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Blonde: "What does IDK stand for?" Brunette: "I don’t know." Blonde: "OMG, nobody does!"

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Two black men go inside a movie theater. They sit down and watch the movie.

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What do you call a dead prostitute? - You (or friends name) in 10 years

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knock knock how there me ok come in

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Your mom is so fat that she has to wear large clothing.

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Man walks in the bar then buys a drink

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A boy asks his father how babies are made. The father responds, "Babies are created via coital sex. A man rhythmically inserts his erect penis into a woman's vagina until he ejaculates. If his semen successfully fertilizes her egg, a baby will slowly grow in her uterus. After roughly forty weeks of gestation, the baby will be born."

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How many anti-joke fans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Or two if it's a really high bulb and you need a second person to hold the ladder for safety.

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A man comes to a fork in the road. He then looks around then proceeds to pick it up, puts it in his pocket, then continues walking down the road as if nothing had happened.

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milly, milly, milly, cat

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Did you know it is impossible to say "Good eye might" and not sound Australian...

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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A dog is walking down the street. The dog catcher promptly arrives and takes him to the pound. Two months later the dog is in a new, happy home with a wonderful family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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