What did the man bring home from Africa? AIDS.

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Why did the guy not pet the dog? He was allergic.

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Penisland

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A dog walks into a bar and succumbs to heartworm.

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what's the difference between a white man and a black man? their skin color

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Q: who's Snow White's brother A: egg white Get the yolk!

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whats woorse then being stupid? kaelynn... aka big head

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Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

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What doesnt have arms and legs? A brick.

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what do you call a man with three eyes and eleven fingers? his name

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Q: What's different about a boy and a girl? A: Nothing. There used to be a notable difference but nowadays you have to strain in order to tell them apart.

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a black guy a chinese guy a jewish guy and a gay guy are standing on a ledge. they are all ready to jump off and commit suicide. suddenly a basketball falls from the sky. the black guy is like oh shit that my bball. he cant resist, he jumps off the ledge, grabs the ball, spins in mid air, and shoots it through the window that they came out of. then he falls to his death. the other three guys are questioning whether they wanna actually kill themselves when all of a sudden a jiggly dildo flies past. the gay guy sees it, and he needs it in his butthole. he jumps off, grabs the dildo, shoves it in his ass, and falls to his death. the chinese and the jew are the last alive. they decide that they dont want to die and they start crawling back towards the window. then out of nowhere, two quarters and a nickel shoot up from the ground, right in front of them. the jew needs them. he jumps off the ledge and pockets the change. then he falls to his death. the chinese guy is the last one alive. he jumps off and falls to his death.

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Knock,knock whose there? The pizza delivery guy the pizza delivery guy who the pizza delivery guy who didnt give you your pizza

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Where did Suzie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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When life gives you lemons, you realise that life isn't a physical object and therefore you have problems. Have a nice day.

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What's wrong with woman Everything

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What's harder than a rock? The dead baby in my freezer.

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Why must you never cross an elephant with a human being? It is impossible anyway.

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A black baby dies and goes to Heaven. When god put wings on him the baby sais, "Ahh gee god am I an angel?" Then god sais, "Nahh nigga you a bat."

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You know what's better than a taco? A better taco.

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A black guy and Hispanic guy jump off the Empire State Building at the EXACT same time. Who dies first? Who cares?!

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Why do black people log onto blackpeoplemeet.com? To meet black people.

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Christopher Reeve walks into a room.

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John - hey do you have tickets to see Oasis? Sam - No I bought green day tickets intead. John rolls his eyes at sam very dissapointedly then proceeds to go home. The next day Sam phones John excitedly telling him he traded his Green day tickets for Oasis tickets, a smile appears on Johns and Sams faces, not that they can see each other, they both then put the phone down. An African died. Green Day are a bad band.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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