Q: Why was the duck hands down hilarious? A: It wasn't, ducks don't have hands and with human beings able to be equipped with emotions such as to see an object or living organism as funny, do not view these mammals in a humorous manner.

Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy but get in the van

Little Jimmy was afraid, and didn't like Santa Claus. So one Christmas Eve, he poured rat poison in Santa's milk. Little Jimmy no longer has parents.

Why was the little boy crying? He had a frog stapled to his face.

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

hi my name is 50 cent my mom swallowd 2 quarters befor i was born dsthgiudghyudgfuawyg

What's the Capitol of Washington dc? W

Why do seagulls fly over seas? Because if they flew over bays they'd be called bagels.

Why couldn't the little pirate see the movie? His dad had just died in a freak accident on the boat. He was going to the funeral that day. Life as a pirate isn't at all as it seems. Little Jimmy the pirate, had nothing. He had no family. His mother dead already, his sister and brother refusing to speak to him because he ran off to be a pirate with his father. Clearly, he had no idea what he was getting into, because his father was gone. What was he to do now? He had no one to go to. The ship mates were all either completly insane or never sober. That very night, Jimmy took the pistol off the ship captian and shot himself point blank in the head. Little Jimmy is in a better place now. With his mother and father. In a place where he cant be harmed any more. I miss you Jim <3. ~ Jack Sullivan

Let's see how many dislikes this can get!

Anti-Joke Memes? That Shouldn't Be A Thing

Why do jewish women like to get their sons circumcised? They like anything 25% off.

Whats the difference between a car and a dead child? I don't have a dead baby in my basement.

Q: How many jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 6 million and 1

yo mama is so fat that they call her fat mama

knock knock who's there GET IN THE VAN!

A guy walks into a bar. He puts an icepack on his head so it doesn't swell, and decides to go out for a drink. He walks into a bar and thinks to himself, "that's twice today, maybe I should just go home."

Your mom is so fat, that it causes great concern for her family.

Why did the zombie go to school? Zombies do not exist and certainly do not go to school.

Chuck Norris can bench 210 pounds.

What is brown and sticky? A stick

What is the diffrence between a guy and pie? The pie taste like fruit somethimes

2 people with ADD are playing baseball. One of them pitches to the other guy and the other guy swings his arms around, misses, then gets hit by a baseball bat. The batter then realized he was the pitcher and the other guy has gone off chasing after a bird that just flew by.

What did timmy fall off the swings? He had no arms

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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