Roses are red. Violets are red. Tulips are red. My garden is on fire.

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What did the man get when he found a genie in a lamp? The rest of his life in an asylum for schizophrenia.

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What's a small person? A midget

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What do you do when life gives you lemons? Life is an abstract object incapable of handing out gifts, thus if given a lemon by life you should go to a doctor to make sure you don't have an undiagnosed disease.

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Why did the mormon walk into a bar? He didn't. Mormons don't drink.

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Q: What is black, white, and red all over? A: A white wall with black and red paint just added onto it recently.

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How many prostitutes do I have to kill in order to get an erection? Three.

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Do is the Most Famous Line on youtube Answer- Do the Flop

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? "Poker Face"

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what did helen keller say when she dropped a box on her toe. nothing. helen keller cannot speak

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That didn't hurt.

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A dentist, a librarian, a construction worker, a gynecologist, a zookeeper, a shoemaker, a terrorist, a politician, a cyclist, a truck driver, a kangaroo, a Mexican, a blonde, a Jewish black guy, a Honda Civic, a monkey, a penguin, an FBI agent, a stock broker, a president of a foreign country, a CEO of a very wealthy company regarding AIDS, a founder of one of top downloaded apps in the market, a chief executive, a cook, a waitress, a priest, a nun, a little boy, a fairy, a dinosaur, and a skeleton walks into a bar. There's no punchline.

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Why doesn't Gary like me? Because I killed his family and fed them to him.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a wild dog on the other side, so he crossed the road to avoid potential danger.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Being a jew in the Holocaust.

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24!

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Why did the man throw his watch out the window? Because it was broken.

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What did the cab driver say to the duck who wanted a ride in the cab? Get out of the cab.

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An Englishman, an American, and an Australian walk into a bar. They speak English to each other.

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What is the square root of 69? 8.30662386

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why do birds fly away when you go near them? incase your black

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What did the black man say to the policeman? "Take it easy."

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I hate it when sentences don't end the way you expect them potato.

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What do you call a black priest? Religious.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops