There is a tiger in front of you a lion behind you and a bear beside you what do you do? Get of the marry go round

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Samantha ate 62 cookies. Then she ate 300 more. How many did she eat after that? None she didn't for the next 6 years after developing an eating disorder.

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Why'd Sally fall of the swing She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not sally

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A man goes to a doctor to check about an itch on his testicles. Turns out it was just a rash and is promptly prescribed medication and it clears up in a week.

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Why did Michael Jackson go to McDonald's? Because he was hungry.

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How u know when ur sister have periods... Fathers dig taste like blood

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, Run Quick, Before I eat you and die of obesity due to high blood pressure and bad heart disease!!!

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Knock knock Who's there? Police Police who? You're under arrest, open up or we'll knock your door down.

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1234 5

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whats white and sticking?... glue, you dirty bastard

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Why wouldn't the man in a wheelchair see out the window? The curtains were closed

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What do you call 10 dead babies in a blender? A horrible, horrible child abuse incident.

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What is a question?

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There is a man with the surname of Westmoreland. This is a terrible name.

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What's brown and sticky? Poo

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A jew go out of a bar

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Why did the seal get confused when a spider tried to high five him? Because spiders have eight legs.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

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What do you do with dead chemists? You carefully place their remnants in a casket, which is to be placed in a precisely dug hole. Once the casket is placed, you put a gravestone into the ground, signifying the chemists' date of birth and death.

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Why did the woman cross the road? She didn't. They are no roads in the kitchen.

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Why was the black man escorted out of the bar. He was 10

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A game of one-on-one basketball in a common physical education class in present day mexico city.

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I went to the zoo yesterday. There was only one dog, it was a shitzu

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Why didn't the lactose intolerant man get a drink at the bar? He was the designated driver.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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