How do you kill a blonde? lightsabre to the throat should do it

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Hey what time is it. 3:15

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Two Jewish men walk into a butcher shop. They don't buy any pork because that is a fundamental dietary restriction placed upon by their religion.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

I'm not wearing any underwear. Why? Because I am have built in underwear. ;)

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats white and cant fly an aeroplane? A fridge

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the chicken cross the road? Various reasons, one of which was to visit his wife in hospital where she was suffering from a sever case of depression. The other reason was to say his last words to her as she also has lung cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why don't I ever lmao? Because my ass got bitten off by a bear.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A black guy and a Mexican are sitting in a car who's driving??? The Cops

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Dont be silly, you know that everything is relative, and that relativity is as unlimited as the subconscious mind, give me ten more minutes, and I can hypnotize you in five minutes in order to see life in slow motion yourself for as long as you feel like. Just dont expect your body to adjust like mine, meaning that if you try to run, your brain will use its old habits while your perception is used to the slow ones... In other words, you will end up on the floor or smacking into a wall.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

96

thumb_up thumb_down +4

i said "what what in the butt, i said what what in the butt?"

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the fish bite the house? Because he wanted to eat the house

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what's black, long, and moves around a lot? a van.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did Tom get for Christmas? Gloves, but Tom had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? NOT TOM

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Knock knock. Who's there? The police. We have reason to believe you are hiding large amounts of narcotics in your residence and have obtained a search warrant for the premises. Open the door or we will be required to use forceful means of entry.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Write your own pointless joke on http://pointless-jokes.tk

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why was the little boy crying? His whole family died.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What is laying in the corner of the living room of an abandoned house and keeps getting smaller over the years? A decaying baby left there by a crack-head.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q, Where did Rebecca Black go to eat? A. TGI Fridays

thumb_up thumb_down

Roses are red, violet are blue I have AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down

A man shaves at least 3 times a week, yet he has the longest beard in town, how is that possible? He shaves his head because he's embarrassed about his rampant and patchy balding.

thumb_up thumb_down

d

thumb_up thumb_down

silly rabbit, rape is for babies

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops