Your moms so fat, she's not skinny

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When did the black man go to the pharmacy and why ? His wife , for whom he cared very much , had a cold and he had to get her prescription for her . On top of that , he had a horrible problem problem with painkillers that caused him to have an aneurysm on the way there .

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Two ducks are sitting in the bathtub. One asks, "Hey, can you please pass the soap?" The other responds, "Sure, if you pass the typewriter."

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How many ADD kids dose it take to screw in a light bulb? one; the attention deficit disorder dose not take away the ability too screw in a light bulb.

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If Roger buys 109 candy bars and eats 65, what does he have? Diabetes.

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Im gonna Rape that Liberato kid you was talking about, ALL UP THE ASS i will find him.

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How do you kill a blue elephant? How? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? How? You hold it's nose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a orange elephant? How? You can't, they don't exist. How do you kill a white elephant? How? You tickle it till it turns pink, then you hold it's noose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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Why doesn't stevie wonder play snooker? Because it's not very popular in the US.

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Whats worse then your penis in your mouth? Your mom in your penis.

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How do you realize your life is over? You don't, but the coroner does.

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What did the husband tell his obese wife? I love you honey

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What do you call a red sore on your genitals? Herpes, probably.

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how do you kill a blonde? -a gun, knife or any other lethal object

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i am a duck. are you a duck. yes i am a duck.

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You say you can read me like a book, well the jokes on you. I am not a book.

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whats red and smells like blue paint? half a painter.

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What did the Ethiopian eat for dinner? Nothing

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Why is Ellen so funny? Because she is a comedian.

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Q: What did the black guy say when he stubbed his toe? A: Ouch.

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Why was the woman poor at driving? Because she had not yet passed her driving test.

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when do you go to heaven? Never, it doesn't exist.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's a woman.

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What did Helen Keller's parents do to punish her? They gave her a stern talking to and then grounded her for a couple days.

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Why did the blonde buy a condom? Because she had a penis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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