Hollywood presents: "HELP US MARIO! THE WORLD IS BEING OVERWHELMED BY KOOPA AND HIS FORCES OF TURTLES!" "What the hell do you want me to do? I am a damn plumber, squish them? Besides they are just turtles" "Oh yeah..." Steven Spielberg: Get bay on this script, at least its much better than the first one.

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What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table isn't a whore.

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What is brown, smells like shit and on fire? A muslim after the bomb vest malfuctioned!

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Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

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Jim fell of his bike, wanna know how. Someone threw a car at him. Knock knock, who's there, not Jim

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What's a thither? My sister with a lisp.

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Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

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What would you like to drink? A Pepsi. Is Coca-Cola okay? No.

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two muffins are in an oven. 30 min. later i ate a delicious treat.

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i like my women how i like my coffee ....i dont like coffee

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Why was the girl crying? She got kicked in the vagina

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What do u call a black pope? A poooooopppp!

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obama is a good president

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Hey

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A. Knock-knock. B. Who's there? A. Hey, your doorbell's broken.

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Q: how do you get a man with one arm out of a tree? A: shoot him

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What did the cow call the hen? A hen, what else would you call it?

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why is my brother white and i am brown? the milk man is very fast!

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-What's a real anti joke? -This.

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What do Chuck Norris and Oprah Winfrey have in common? They are both white, male, good actors, white, rich, and white. Except for the eagle.

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Knock Knock. Come in. -mattobrado

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whats worse then finding out your girlfriend cheated on you.. -9/11

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Why was the little boy crying? His whole family died.

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Why does Jerry sandusky like little boys? Because each and every intellectual human being have different interests

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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