What's (333x4)-198+(456x100,432)-10+5? Bet ya said i don't know! I don't either.

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whats pink and fluffy pink fluff

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How many Aodhan's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Aodhan's da has already screwed all the lightbulbs...

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Where did Sally go during the bombing? Everywhere

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Disregard Females, Acquire Currency.

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What is the diffrence between a strait guy and a gay guy? The strait guy gets into heaven.

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People Eating Tasty Animals

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A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some chapstick, put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because as all people know, Ducks cannot speak, however, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need chapstick anyway, since he has no lips.

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So this is an anti-joke website, right?

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three men walked into a bar, can't believe know one noticed it.

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knock knock hows there sorry but i was to lazy to think of an ending

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What's has 4 wheels But ain't a blue car A red car

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noodles

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Two Jewish Rabbis are sitting in a sandbox....

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Chuck Norris can beat an eleven-year-old in a fight.

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roses are red violets are blue god made me pretty what happened to you?

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Three blind men walk into a bar but they were unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from them would be exploitative.

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What happens when you eat all the strawberries? They are GONE...

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Why did the sponge go to the store? The same reason all sponges go to stores: to be sold to patrons of said store.

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milly, milly, milly, cat

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Two strangers are sitting at a bar having a drink. One is a young, fat, red-headed guy named Fred. The other is an elderly grey-haired man. After a while, Fred turns to the old man and awkwardly asks: "Excuse me sir would ya' mind givin me some advice? There's this girl who has sat next to me on the bus every morning for the past three months. She's the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. She always smiles and winks at me. I wannna ask her on a date but every time I go to do it I freeze. I just don't know what to say. I'm sorry to bother you, but I'm falling for this girl and I don't know what in the world to do. Any tips?" The old man continues to sit quietly, slowly sipping his drink. After a while the old man looks at Fred. "Hmmm" says the old man, as he thinks over Fred's question. "What is your name son?" He asks Fred. "It's Fred sir," replies Fred. "Hmmm," the old man says again as he continues to think over Fred's question. The old man then stands up, takes out a gun, and shoots Fred in the face. Fred never saw it coming.

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Q: What's worse than a bee sting? A: Two bee stings. Q: What's worse than two bee stings? A: Three bee stings. Q: What's worse than three bee stings? A: Rape.

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Why did the man with no arms and legs fall out of the tree? Gravity.

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Why did the man buy a rope? Because he needed a noose

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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