What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas. A pool.

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I'm not wearing underwear Why not Cause I have built in underwear

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Why did the cow go moo, because its a cow

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two philosophers stood in silence at the foot of a very large mountain; a mountain not only too high to climb, but also too wide to walk around. So the first philosopher finally speaks: "...so, what do you do for a living?"

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I tried to post an unfunny punch-line-less joke on anti-joke. It worked and I got tons of emotional affirmation from it and stuff, so thanks.

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What did the father tell his son on his death bed? Nothing. He was hit by a car and was now a vegetable.

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What do you say to the man with lopsided balls? I am terribly sorry, your condition has most certainly left you socially alienated and confused.

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If you want to paint a wall red, what is the fastest way to paint it with a crying baby? The baby will get very annoying and delay your wall from being painted so you put it in its crib in another room until you are done.

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10 years ago, i man got cancer. He recovered and now leads a normal life.

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A Fish walks into a bar. It died of oxygen starvation.

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Why doesn't Superman eat peanuts? He doesn't like them

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair because he had cancer

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two boys break out in a verbal fight. the first boy says your so stupid youd sell a cow for a gallon of milk. the second boy replied, i agree with you 110%.

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Your landlord, clear out your stuff by tuesday"

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What do you call a deaf person? You don't they can't hear you.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to get the waffle ice cream cone that was on the ground next to the little child who got hit by a bus.

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your momma is so stupid she failed math class

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there are 2 black guys and a spanish guy in a car. who is driving? a sober, US citizen over the age of 16

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why didnt the dog bark? he died in his sleep

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A man powers up his computer but then realizes he's in China.

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What happened to the dying kangaroo? He died What animal is not in the lion king? Kangaroo --why? Because he died...

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If you can dodge a traffic, that probably has little or no relation to how well you can dodge a ball.

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What is the best thing since sliced bread? Sliced butter.

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WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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