What did the white guy the black guy and the Asian all have in common Penises

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Two cows are standing in a field One cow says "Mooooo"..... and the other cow says "mooooo" also because they are both cows and cannot speak

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Q; Why does paint dry? A; Because plankton are single cell organisms

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Why would you throw a hooker in a lake? To go fishing

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Yo Mama is so ugly she wears a mask on halloween

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Two business men, a priest and three boys are on a plane which is going down. There are only three parachutes. One business man says that they should allow the children to have the parachutes as they have long lives ahead of them. The other business man says screw the children. The priest looks up at the second business man. After a short but heated argument they all agree to let the children have the parachutes. The three children then proceed to jump out of the plane with the parachutes. The two business men and the priest watch as they descend upon the earth. The plane then crashes into a mountain, killing the business men and the priest. Once the boys were safely on land they went back to their daily lives in their individual homes. Turns out a serial killer had escaped from prison, all three children were found dead the next morning, the cause of death of course being that each had contracted some form of a sexually transmitted disease from the priest.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

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A duck walked up to the lemonade stand and he said the the man running the stand hey ba ba ba got any grapes? the man said no but i got some shut the F*CK up!

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name-Sally-Sue What I am good at in school: readin' annnd...math. What I need to work on in school: spelin

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i like my women how i like my coffee ....i dont like coffee

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing chair ? Gravity.

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Why was the elderly, Asian, blond pulled over by the officer? She was, and has been completely blind since birth.

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*via text message* Me: Hey Trevor! You at home? Trevor: This is Trevor's mom. Trevor committed suicide today.. Me: OMG! Why?!? Trevor: Because when I gave him a glass of water, it had 3 ice cubes. Trevor doesn't like odd numbers.

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two fish are in a tank.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? The KKK

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Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

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Why did the blind man drown? Because he couldn't swim.

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Listen I know you're a cat and I'm a cat but I know we can be friends

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What's the most wonderful time of the year? When your wife dies.

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i wish i was a tree !

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What did the goat say to the dolphin dogs don't lay eggs

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Whats worse than your camera not working? getting hit by a fridge during the Holocaust

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Whats Funnier than 24?........ 25

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What do you call a kid with no arms annd legs? Names

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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