Why did the blonde stare at the carton of orange juice? Because she was lost in her thoughts about her dead husband, and how much he loved orange juice.

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A man was walking outside at night and he heard thunder and saw lighting so he took out a metal pole.

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A kid goes to the doctor and orders a salad. The doctor replies, "This is a smoking-free environment". The kid puts out his cigar and goes to Olive Garden to get his physical.

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PENIS

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Guess what, I have cancer.

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Why didn't Dave buy his wife a watch for her birthday? Because she already had one.

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why did the football coach go to the bank? to make a deposit into his account

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What did the boy and girl do at the wedding? 69:)

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What's orange and can fly through walls? A Magic Orange.

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What's 6+2? 16

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Why couldn't the girl charge her phone? The charger wasn't plugged in.

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Excuses are like butt holes...they are round

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What did one wall say to the other? Nothing, walls don't talk.

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why was the panda sent to prison? he played a major roll in the bombing of 9-11

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I met a man today. His name was John.

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What do you call 2 black men sitting on a porch? Craig and Smokey

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Why did Jim laugh so hard? Triangle!

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What did Sally get on her 18th birthday? Herpes

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Teacher: Maria please point to America on the map. Maria: This is it. Teacher: Well done. Now class, who found America? Class: Maria did.

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A Jew returns change.

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Lol you are really adorable, is more like maybe we will ask you some time, but hey, if you are asking, I mean you are beautiful, insecure, easy to break... I am totally joking by the way, you are completely down to earth, you are sweet, you know what you want, etc etc, hey, and to know what you want in life you got to be confident. Wait a second... I "act" like a savage? Lawl, "streams of OceANUS catchphrase"

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There was a deaf guy who heard a mute guy tell someone that a blind guy saw a guy with no legs win the marathon

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither has he.

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hi

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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