So a Jew, a black guy, and a Mexican all walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey guys, what would you like?" They all get beer.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Your momma's so fat: She has found a value in relationships beyond an aesthetic level.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

I have the heart of a child... in a jar on my desk.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

penis

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Example of a pro gamer: A kid who gets all F's in gradeschool, dosent goto collage, gets fat, dies alone.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What happens when you eat too many breadsticks? You get constipated.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What do a large mouth bass and my wife have in common? They are both in the Animal kingdom, both are vertebrates and they share many other traits such as eyes, a notochord, and epaxial/hypaxial musculature.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's huge, gray, and has a trunk and wings. An elephant with wings glued to it.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

3 ducks are sitting in a pond. one with blonde feathers. one with brown feathers, and one with white feathers. A Transvestite Inbred Donkey Man kills them instantly.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why do women where make-up and perfume? because they are ugly and they smell bad.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why is 6 afraid of 7... Because 7 raped her little sister

thumb_up thumb_down +25

what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? seeing this joke 1000 times on this website

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Two gay men in a hottub. They relaxed for about half an hour before getting out and going to the bed, where they fell asleep.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A man is walking down the street when, on the other side, he see's another man, with what appears to be an orange for a head. Unable to contain his curiosity, he approaches and enquires: "Excuse me, but I couldn't help noticing that you have you have an orange for a head..." "That's right" says the man with an orange for a head. "I met a magical genie one day who granted me three wishes..." "Amazing" says the first man, "Please continue". "Well, for my first wish, I wished I was incredibly rich, and that every day, I woke up in a four-poster bed full of used bank notes, and a statement with twenty zeros". "Did that happen?" askes the first man. "It did indeed", replies the man with an orange for a head. "I'm probably the richest man in the world". "Amazing!" replies the first man. "What did you wish for next?" "For my second wish, I wished to be incredibly attractive to women, and that every day, in my four poster bed full of money, when I awoke, there would be three of the most beautiful, naked women imaginable." "Wow! Did THAT happen?" "Of course! To be honest though, that gets a bit of a bind - walking around is a bit difficult these days, in fact, I'm on my way to pick up some cream." "No way, that's amazing!" says the first man. "What was your third wish?" "Well..." replies the man with an orange for a head, "For my third wish, I wished I had an orange for a head."

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the chicken cross the road? What does chicken mean?

thumb_up thumb_down +23

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Hypothetical questions are a waste of time and you are not achieving your full potential by reading this during work.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Dead babies.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Small breasts.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did the man say to hitler? hi hitler.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Hey Jim? What? Pass the stapler.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How do you leave a man in suspense...

thumb_up thumb_down +19

>>-------------[Knee]---------->>>

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What is purple, covered in pus, and squeals? A purple hippo with an infected scab yelling at the pain

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops