Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

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Why did the McCann's parent's leave the window's and doors open? Because Portugal is a very hot climate, And they expected the place they were staying to be safe as lot's of tourist's stay there throughout the year.

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What happens if you fall of a cliff You die

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Whats worse then sneezing on someone? sneeze on someone and find out

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Do you know what would happen if Hitler was still alive today. Nothing he's not.

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam.

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Why couldn't Gladice get out of bed? Because she was dead!

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Why did the man open up a umbrella? Because it was raining..

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

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What happened to the man that walked into the bar... He walked into the bar

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Why did the man steal the little girl? He didn't. She was his daughter and they were driving home after picking up the groceries.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a killer

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

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What did the amputee get for chritmas? A bicycle

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Roses are red, Violets are red, I stabbed someone in my garden, There's blood everywhere

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Why was the cat meowing really loud? It was on fire. Why did the cat suddenly stop meowing? It died.

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How is an elephant like a grape? They're both purple, except for the elephant.

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What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

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Your mom is so fat, that i don't think she's attractive anymore.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? No one, because a hollowed out pineapple carcass would not be able to last longer than a month in that high concentration of sodium.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a larger worm in your apple.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. The police catch them, and they are sentenced to jail.

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Yo mama so stupid, she scored poorly on her SAT exams in high school. She was unable to recieve a college education. She now works as a full time waitress at a small diner. She earns minimum wage and is still getting nowhere on her search for a better job.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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