A man was driving down the road and was swerving, a cop stops him and asks him to walk in a straight line, believing him to be drunk. The man replies "I can't, I've been blind since I was a child."

What's black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

What did the down syndrome kid get for christmas? Pulmonary Embolisms.

Sigh, everybody in the world hates me :( Moral: Seven billion people? Realy?

Why is Dave's baby dead? Because his wife threw it into the path a Big-rig.

Did you see Helen Keller's doll house? No... Well it's really nice!

A family walks into a talent agency. Talen agent says "Okay, what's your act called?" Dad replies "The Aristocrats!"

How many easily offended people does it take to change a light bulb? Shut up, that's not funny!

Stevie Wonders said to his friend, "Have you seen my house?" "No" "Neither have I"

Wha'ts the difference between Justin Beiber and a piece of hot muff garbage? Fart triscuits.

Why did the old man cry? Because he had just witnessed his wife die.

Why Do cats purr when you pet them? I'm actually asking a question there I don't know why.

Q. What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in front of a door? A. Matt

What would kill a Muslim if they were to ingest it? Arsenic

Why couldn't the mute kid tell his mom the house was on fire? Casue he fell down the stairs and broke his hands...

Jamie: Peter your hands smell like cows! Jason: eeh no they smell like cows balls

Q: How are a plum and a rabbit alike? A: They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? dead parents.

MRCANN YOUR A FUCKIN' CARROT LERN 2 FOCKIN SIT IN YER HOLE YA FUCKIN PLANT

www.hurr-durr.com

What's blue and smells like sky? Sky

an 80 yr old man apllies to walmart

whats cold, blue and hard? a frozen blueberry.

your momma so stupid she dropped out of high school

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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