What did the Muslim do when he was in a big American crowd? He was socializing.

Q. What do you call a bear ripping a man to pieces? A. A bear.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Madame. Madame who? Just kidding it's Steve, but my damn foot's stuck in the door.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side why didnt the chicken cross back? for the first time in his life, Clucky the chicken, felt liberated. his cruel life flashed before his eyes, forcing him to remember all the bad tines he had spent on the McKinley farm. all the eggs stolen from him, watching all his friends being taken for slaughter. it all came back. from the other side of the road, Clucky saw a place he never wanted to go back to, a place he wanted to forget. the day he chose not to cross back was the first real day in Clucky's life.

why'd the chicken committed suicide?? to get to the other-side

Why didn't the chicken cross the road... Because he got hurt last week while crossing the road.

What do you call a man with 3 legs and one arm jumping on a trampoline? By his name.

tim tebow is a great quarterback

live babies

Why was the child in the clown's car? Because the clown was a serial killer and abducted the child while he was at soccer practice, the child then raped and murdered

What do you call a fish with no eye? A fsh

Q: What did Helen Keller say to the bartender? A: "I would like a bud lite please" it was a different Helen Kellar

Why did the cat fall out of the tree? Cause the branch broke. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? Cause it was stapled to the cat.

What did the pickle say to the cucumber? I am you from the future!

Women's rights

Why did the man go to space? He was a highly trained astronaut

Dallas Cowboys

Global Warming.

i have aids and a chode

Whats the difference between andreas and a dog? the dog has a tail.

ekoj

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Expensive cheese.

Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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