Can I have a dollar? I don't know, can you?

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How do you prevent a baby from crawling all over the place? You nail his hands to the floor

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What do you call a black man on a bike? A hard-working individual who found a steady job and earned enough money to buy a bicycle of his own which he rides to and from his job because he is healthy, doesn't like to waste money on gas, and doesn't like the pollution automobiles put into the air. By Darragh Hamilton

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Guy: Roses are red, violets are blue, you're beautiful and sexy too. Girl: Roses are red violets are blue, how many girls have you told that to? Guy:... Girl: Exactly.

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A stipper walked into a club, though it was a golf club so she tripped and cracked her skull on it.The end.

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Women's Soccer.

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How many chickens did Moses bring to the ark? 2

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Roses Are Potato, Violets Are Booze, Im Irish and i hate Jews.

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I woke up in bed with someone this morning. ... Hah.

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What did the man say when he saw Niagra falls? Nothing, he was blind.

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What did the little boy get after falling and hitting his face on the ground? A prolonged nosebleed. And Leukemia.

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Mooses

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Knock knock. Who's there? The IRS, please get out of the way.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You pour cold water on her head or make a loud noise nearby.

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what did the pornography filmer say to the asain man as he was having sex? im taking a highly pixelated recording of you and your partner engaging in sexual intercourse

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Why did Wiggy fall into the toilet? Wiggy was the name of his turd.

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What do you call 50 jewish, homeless men peeing into a river? Pollution.

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Why did the man cross the road He didn't, he died after being hit by a car

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why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

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Nothing exceedingly odd happened at a bar

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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What is Obamas favorite book? I don't know, ask him.

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what is the difference between the number 2 and the number 5 3

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Roses are red Violets are blue Does this rag smell Like chloroform to you?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops