What is black white and red all over? A zebra which a lion did not finish eating.

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You know what sucks? A vacuum.

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A leper sees that a woman has dropped a bag of groceries on the sidewalk. "Hey ma'am, can I give you a HAND?" asks the leper. "No thank you, sir. I can manage." replies the woman. "That's a relief," laughs the leper, shyly. "I am quite weak due to leprocy."

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A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

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What's white and horny? a unicorn.

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guess what happened to ur mom? my mom is ded... oh...

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How many Women's Rights activists does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They can't change anything.

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“It doesn’t take a lot to turn me on” – William Deane

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What shouldn't you say to a dementia patient? You already said that.

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What did the old man say after he fell down? nothing.

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bangers and mash?

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when god created an asian he said 'Crispy"

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What do joe greene and joe biden have in common? Their first name

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Bacon makes everything delicious, yes? And coffee makes everything exciting, yes? Put the two together and you get a caffeinated porky roller coaster in your mouth.

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A magician was driving down the road and turned into a driveway...

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Why does everyone treat Jesus as some sort of saint for making five thousand people bread, when Hitler made six million people toast?

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An aspiring lawyer walks into a Bar. He will find out if he passed in a few months.

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5 black men walk into a 7-11 at midnight. They clog the all of the toilets in the mens bathroom causing them to over run.

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knock knock... who's there... i dont know i aint got a house

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Why a frog can fly? It has magic. Why a snake can fly? It ate the magic frog. Why a eagle can fly? It has wings.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't cross it. He was pushed.

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What happens when 4 friends throw an egg into oncoming traffic, they hit a fire hydrant!

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what happens when you step on a bear trap? Alot of pain.

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Three guys walk into a bar. First guy goes up to the bartender and orders a beer. Second guy goes up and orders 2 beers. Third guy sits down and saves seats for the other two guys.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops