what's brown and sticky? A Stick

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what is the difference between a blond and a red head? one is has blond hair and one has red hair

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why is coltin alexander such a duche? because no one loves him

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What's worse then getting a broken bone? A large marsupial charging at you with vicious speed

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Indians

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I <3 Hitler

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? She had no arms

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You know what they say about guys with big feet. They have big feet.

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Q: How many different Pokèmon are there? A: Pokèmon aren't real.

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What did the 3 month old puppy get for Valentines day? Heart Worms. What'd he get for Christmas? Put down.

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why does clive keep getting crunk? because no girl satisfies him as much as geros

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Q:What's the greatest part about having sex with twenty five year old girls? A: There's 20 of them

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knock knock! who is there? its knock! knock who??? knock knock... who is there.... i told you its knock... knock who??? knock knock... WHO IS THERE!! OMG I TOLD YOU ITS KNOCK! KNOCK WHO!! WHO IS KNOCK! KNOCK KNOCK OMG WTF! HOLY SHIT WHO IS THERE! ITS KNOCK WE HAVE KNOWN EACH OTHER OUR WHOLE LIVES! KNOCK WHO?? KNOCK KNOCK WHY DONT YOU REMEMBER ME! oh knock knock from next door! who is there???? jk.. knock...knock......omg put down the gun knock knock stop i love you knock its not worth it!! NO KNOC!!! GUNSHOT* KNOCK NOOOOO!!! I LOVED YOU SOMEONE CALL 911!! OMG KNOCK WHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH KNOCK WHY!!!!

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His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

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What did the boy say to the elders at the senior center? Dayum, you're all ugly!

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A devout Christian dies. Peter winks as his soul passes through the impenetrable Gates of Heaven. Everyone is gay and– like, gay as in happy– Fags aren't allowed in Heaven.

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How many dead babies can you fit in an oven? Depends on if you put them in the blender first.

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what did hayley say to missy last night? I'm tired bye

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Oh, no! There is a ginger jew within 2 meters of me!

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A priest, a rabbi and a mullah walk into a bar. The bartender looks at the three, laughs and says "Please leave now, God is dead"

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Why didnt Steve Jobs make an iphone 5? He died

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How do you post a Tasmanian devil? Recorded Delivery

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On a scale of 1 to Lord Voldemort, how awkward would you say your hugs are?

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John said: "This roller coaster makes me green." HIs mother replied: "That's because you have leprosy."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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