Why did the boy fall of of his bicycle? He was hit by an asteroid.

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Goodbye to the people who hated on me.

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What did the police officer say to the bank robber? You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to speak to an attorney, and to have an attorney present during any questioning. If you cannot afford a lawyer, one will be provided for you at government expense.

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what do you call a black man in a police car? either officer or offender, depending on what role he has in the crime.

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You can't choose your family, so choose someone else's.

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what is the difference between a black person and a white person there skin

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Q: How do you confuse a blonde? A: You tell her an anti joke

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Drunk, a tweeker and a pot head are walking together when they come upon a huge wall with a large, locked gate in the middle of it. The drunk shouts "lesh shmash it down!" then passes out. The tweeker says "Dude, we should totally take the lock apart and see if there's some kind of mechanism in there holding it together that we can use to build some sort of machine for taking... oh man I gotta crap so bad! Either of you guys gota smoke?" and the pot head says "We should sit here and wait." I didn't say it was a good story

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What's black and white and red all over? A mime that got hit by a truck.

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a mulslim wlaks past a bomb shop on his way to join the international peace club

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who is smarter than a human? a nerd

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Why was the Indian at the casino? He had a gambling addiction.

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What do you give the person who has everything? A 20$ gift voucher

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How are a black man and a banana similar? They are both intelligent human beings, except for the banana.

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Angus is so Scottish he wears a kilt when it is socially appropriate.

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Does Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? No, it's a scam.

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roses are red violets are blue .no one cares about you, your a jew.

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Q1: How do you get an elephant to laugh? A1: Tell it a joke. Q2: How do you get a cow to laugh? A2: Cows can't laugh.

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Why was the black man picking cotton? Because he was in an area where slavery is a socially and morally accepted practice.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Sex with helen keller.

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What happened to the boy who wnt through puberty? He bacame a man. There is nothing funny about a perfectly normal expirience that everyone goes through wether they like it or not.

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There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight. In time, the brothers reached a river too deep to wade through and too dangerous to swim across. However, these brothers were learned in the magical arts, and so they simply waved their wands and made a bridge appear across the treacherous water. They were halfway across it when they found their path blocked by a hooded figure. This hooded figure then proceeded to step out of the shadows and mug them, all three of them were brutally murdered. This is why you stay away from hooded figures when you are being talked about in a story being told in third person.

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Why did the boy drop his icecream cone? Because of the shock of seeing his dead family.

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What do call a man with a daranged wife? Married

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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