life is like a penis, short but feels long when it's hard.

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Why couldn't the man stop dancing? Because he had Parkinson's.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue; In Soviet Russia, POEM WRITES YOU!

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What did the three best friends say to eachother? We are all best friends

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How was breakdancing inventented? From niggas trying to steal hubcaps of moving cars!

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Why did the cook throw up at McDonalds? Because his pay check was made out to the Ronald McDonald Foundation.

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What the last thing that went through Osama's mind? A bullet

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Ouch, a papercut .. what could be worse? A hatchet cut.

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I'm getting sick of holocaust jokes can't you Nazi Anne Frankly I'm sick of it

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why do elephants have such flat feet.....? from all those damn trees they have been juming out of....

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A man was wacking it and then his internet went down he then cut off his own balls then his internet came back

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? She didn't, her father named the dog because he was aware of his daughters innability to speak.

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Whats faster than a black guy with a tv? His brother who is a dentist and drives a fast sports car.

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Pretend you are in a box and there is no way out. How do you get out? You don't

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Skeletons neither have muscles nor brains to control any muscles and therefor cannot transport themselves across a road or any stretch of land for that matter.

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Why was the boy holding his breath? A man was holding his head under water.

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A man walks outside and sits down to eat his sandwich.

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Poker face

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what did the man say to the doctor? how the hell would i know, ask him yourself.

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Your mom's so fat, she's is bigger than the average person.

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What did the viking say to the alien? "Vad i namn av valhalla är en utlänning gör här?"

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A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink. "Why of course," comes the reply. The first man then asks: "Where are you from?" "I'm from Ireland," replies the second man. The first man responds: "You don't say, I'm from Ireland too! Let's have another round to Ireland." "Of course," replies the second man. I'm curious, the first man then asks: "Where in Ireland are you from?" "Dublin," comes the reply. "I can't believe it," says the first man. "I'm from Dublin too! Let's have another drink to Dublin." "Of course," replies the second man. Curiosity again strikes and the first man asks: "What school did you go to?" "Saint Mary's," replies the second man, "I graduated in '62." "This is unbelievable!", the first man says. "I went to Saint Mary's and I graduated in '62, too!" About that time in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar. "What's been going on?" he asks the bartender. "Nothing much," replies the bartender. "The O'Kinly twins are drunk again."

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What's worst than losing a million dollars? Losing a plane. Whats worst than losing a plane? losing 239 people, a plane and a million dollars

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What did the priest do to the young catholic boy? Bless him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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