How many people buried in a cemetery are dead? All of them.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What do you call 100 black men at the bottom of the ocean? A scuba group because during these hot summer months they like to cool off and go scuba diving.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

why did Suzy play jump rope with the neighbors kids? She had no legs!

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why do giraffes have long necks? So they can reach higher, un-eaten leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

How does Steven Hawkings refresh after a long day of work? F5

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why did the baby die? Because you had sex with it when it was only 1 years old.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

It's all shits and giggles until someone giggles and shits.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Q: What has 2 eyes and 2 halves of pigs' snout? A: Two pigs peeking around a corner.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Your mother is of a healthy weight and a pleasure to be around.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Roses are red. Violets are blue. This poem sucks. I like math!

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Q: Whats the difference between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Knock knock Go away

thumb_up thumb_down -32

a young boy once lost his mind and then his parents weeped because their son had been decapatated in a horrible motorcycle accident caused by a drunk who had just killed his wife and children and was running from the cops....

thumb_up thumb_down -32

A chronic hemophilliac walks into a bar. He cuts himself and bleeds to death.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Remember that part where Jesus gets angry at a fig three and kills it because it "was lazy" for refusing to grow figs at winter? Brother Jeez, that was kinda mean man! You know it was winter rite? Anti Joke or not, that part is funny, so if Jesus returns and wants you to make him a sammich you better go get that goddamn sammich!

thumb_up thumb_down -32

John has 5 brownies, 3 chocolate bars, and 62 cookies. What does John have now? Diabetes, John has Diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What's worse than getting no up-votes on an anti-joke? Getting down votes

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Wow, that is one of the things I would think I would react all bad to, but that`s, a strangely attractive quality in you.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Two men are talking: Bob: "Do you like fishsticks?" Joe: "Yes I do." Bob: "Your a gay fish."

thumb_up thumb_down -34

How many electricians does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why did the boy die? He got hit by the school bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Q: How did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was dead Q: How did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was taped on to the first one!

thumb_up thumb_down -34

If roses weren't RED and violets weren't Blue... Walls are still solid objects.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops