How do you make a Chef cry? You kill his family.

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Why did Jimmy get off of the park bench? he wanted candy from the man in the white van

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The Holocaust? What's worse than finding a worm in your apple.

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Why did the really unfunny man buy AntiJoke The Book??? It was a good deal and only $9.99.

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A man walked into a bar. He then sat down and ordered a drink.

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What's worse than breaking a leg? Breaking two legs.

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Doctor: “Knock Knock” Patient: “Who's there?” Doctor: “The interrupting Doctor” Patient: “The inter- Doctor: You have cancer.

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Yo mama so stupid she was trying to put her M&M's in alphabetical order

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Whats the difference between cats and dogs? ....cats suck

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How many dead babies does it take to change a lightbulb? None they're dead

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What do you say when your hot chocolate is to hot? This hot chocolate is too hot.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall It depends on how hard you throw them

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Why is the sky blue? Because it is

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If life hands you melons you might be dyslexic

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What do humans and trees have in common? -If you hit them with an ax multiple times, they fal down

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Why was the prison full of black people? Because they were all their for security internships.

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What did the man think as the foul baseball flew rapidly toward his face? Oh man, I thought my tickets were to an NBA game.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a Muslim? Their religion.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

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Of course, the capacity to create a better society, is well within the natural limits of humankind, we do not need Gods in order to be strong, honorable kind, respectful, and so on, we do not need empty promises. We only need, to use our potential as humans, believe in it, and do our best only, if we desire the best results, take care of those that suffer, and believe that they will be there for us when we need them. We can all do it, humanity, yet choosing a lifestyle where we become peasants or soldiers, all promised happiness AFTER we have lived our lives, is what the people have decided. This is the extent of the average man and woman, even if it is far beyond the power of humanity.

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How do you fit 10 babies in a bowl? With a blender. How do you get them out of the bowl? You don't, you've already been arrested for multiple cases of infanticide.

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What do you call a person with an eye patch, no arms, and a mohawk? A person with an eye patch, no arms, and a mohawk.

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What did the guy say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a gay bar. They are closet homosexuals and are searching for partners to engage in consensual sexual intercourse with.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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