What's white, black, red, and flies? An airplane pilot with a battleaxe driven into his head

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A guy walks into a bar. I didn't see anything else.

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Whats whats black, yellow, wnd green all over? The Jamacain flag

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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Why did they name the team mavericks and why Was the maskot a horse? Because 50 years ago they found a blue horse And its name was maverick

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Hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle, the cow jumped over the salamander, macaroni and cheese

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What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other? Whatever her name is.

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Why does everyone love Randy Jackson? Well it's sure not because he's black.

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How do you drown a blonde? Force her head underwater until she can no longer breathe, thus shutting down her brain and killing her.

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What did the man say to his dead wife? "I'm Blind."

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Roses are red, violets are blue if God makes us beautiful, Who made you?

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roses are red so is ur face dont look at me like im a crazy bitch

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Why are there so many anti-jokes about refrigerators? Because the writer of the joke was pressured by terrorists that would kill him if he didn't write about refrigerators.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Your husband died.

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Why did Steve Jobs step down as CEO of Apple? Because he died.

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BOYS ARE DUMB AND THEY SMELL FUNNY AND IM ANGRY

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Quaint? Oh yeah? YOU ARE QUAINT! No seriously, whats that word all about.

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roses are red orchids are black I like you best when you lye on your back

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knock knock whos there a duck a duck who QUACK!

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Why did the man launch his rocket into the sun? He didn't. Overcoming the sun's orbital pull would require your rocket to travel ~7,400,000 mph, which is a velocity that is impossible for today's rockets to reach.

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Hah, I bet a faggot that lost his balls in the war is "above" such things as seduction and all things straight! 25 million US dollars, send them to me within a week, or I will hunt you down by tracking down every single one of your fucking followers (all six of them), and make you wish you where dead. And tell me where you live, send me your sister so I can rape her, send me your boyfriend so I can cut him to pieces, send my your children so I can make sure your genes stop, send my your mothers tits so I can hang them on my wall, and kill your father and post the shit on youtube! Maybe then we are halfway close a settlement.

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Why did the robber wear a mask? Because he had eczema.

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Two cows are standing on the top of North Pole and in a half-inch wind they're spanking a bottle of coconut jam. Suddenly two infrared gallopping fly past them. What's the consequence? That people shouldn't use freshly peeled lemoncakes on underwater cornfields.

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guest who else is a ugly bitch my mom

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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